*Thanksgiving chat* and staying home to clean lol
Nov 22, 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqgLfREwxGg

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it's been one of those days I alley was
gone all day today he's on his way home
now because we have to run to the bank
before they close for the holiday and
I've got to get a couple things turned
into them and he's home now and but I
have been home all day with the kids all
day today but I've been cleaning and
still going through clothes yeah what a
job anyways I will check in with you
guys soon as I get in the car so I can
get us out hey I told you guys I would
check in with you babies are both
sleeping so it's quiet
anyways we've got our little errands ran
I was getting a little busy because
everybody's traveling further turkey
dinner day
I hope you guys are all gonna have a
fantastic holiday for us we personally
don't do Thanksgiving I've had that
asked quite a bit and I've done mostly
you know I have answered most all of you
guys through a message but I thought I
would just mention on video too that no
we don't personally do Thanksgiving but
on Saturday I get to make my first
turkey dinner though so I am truly
excited always gonna help me learn how
to to do it because I've never prepared
a turkey ever so we're gonna have all
the traditional you know Thanksgiving
dinners things because I like having
that stuff so we're gonna do it on
Saturday so I'm really excited about
that and then are any of you guys doing
the Black Friday shopping if so what are
the things that you guys are going to be
looking for this year for me
I'm not going out I am not battling
those crowds not this year not gonna do
it although I love to go and just watch
all the crowds freak out on the stuff
it's it's quite a museum but hang this
here I'm gonna chill at home with my
babies and stay nice and warm but
anyways I just hope that you guys all
are gonna have a fantastic things can
even spend a good quality amount of time
with you guys's and families and make
some sweet memories that's always
amazing thing is to be able to come
together as a family when you don't get
to see your family very often sometimes
it's nice to have that time together so
anyways I hope you guys are traveling
safely and enjoy your guys's time so
when I get home
try and get a few things done that need
to get done around the house and then
I'm going to show you guys me prepping
for dinner and then cooking dinner today
I'm gonna be making the hamburger pasta
dinner always one of his favorite that I
make so I'm gonna make that tonight so I
will show you guys how to do that so
when I get home then I'll just check in
with you guys cuz right now we're just
driving it's pretty actually kind of
walking and looking I'll show you guys
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anybody have recommendations for hair of
a little girl that is curly it gets
matted so bad so easily that when I give
her a bath it is like oh it's I feel
like I'm Kelly now when I'm brushing her
hair because she's got so many tangles
because she will not let me brush it
outside of being in the bath so I bought
this I got this comb I got a pack that's
with all of these in it along with
a pig butt and I have a leave-in
conditioner that I got off of Amazon it
was like 20 bucks for it
and it's really I mean it's supposed to
be really good but I feel like it
doesn't do enough for her hair do you
guys have any suggestions of anything
that I might be able to try on her hair
because I feel so bad but at the same
time I mean I gotta brush through it I
can't just leave it so you guys have any
ideas post them towards me so I can use
them I hope you guys are having a
wonderful Wednesday mine was so
productive I actually felt like I
accomplished some good amount of things
that needed to get accomplished like you
know you say yourself these those lists
of to do's you know your honey-do list
except it's a honeydew to me list ah no
Ali does do a WOD but when he's busy
he's busy and he doesn't have time to
just like stop everything and do the
things that really I really desire to
have done so you're gonna hear the
vacuum anyways um
so today he had like so much he was
doing he was at the car auction for most
of the day so by the time he came home
he was just like he was so tired and we
still had to go when he got home we got
to take off and go run some errands and
get some things done that just clearly
needed to be done sorry you guys I'm
trying to get my arms situated of just
things that needed to get done and so he
came home we went to the bank because we
knew that they weren't gonna be open
tomorrow
so we were just trying to get stuff done
that we knew was gonna be closed so we
went and gassed up and what else we went
to the bank we had a run by a credit
union not for us but for the business
and from there we ended up coming home
traffic was oh my gosh it was
bumper-to-bumper and I only knew it was
gonna get worse so oh and we had a stop
by Walmart to get diapers so yeah could
not forget those oh and I ended I did
forget actually we were already almost
halfway home and I'm like oh honey he's
like Amy we were just on that side I'm
like I know yeah so we ran to Walmart
when got the diapers and he said the
store was Joe I didn't we didn't even
take the kids in I was just like I'm not
hmm
I am not in the mood until with the kids
and deal what they're screaming and
wanting everything ah and then you got
people and your way and yeah I would
probably not be the best mix with me to
be in the store right now so we stayed
home our I mean we stayed in the car so
we went to that and then we came home
and then I just finished up doing what I
needed to get done so I showed you guys
pictures last night of our today of s or
last night playing with the does attempt
that little girl got Desert Inn all over
the blankets so I washed the blanket but
I there wasn't one of my big ones it was
just like a throw blanket and usually
mmm when I wash clothes or when I wash
that blanket I can just put whatever is
left in the dirty hamper just to make it
like a whole load and it totally is fine
but last night when I did
it the blanket had does a 10 on it so
today when I thought excuse me when I
brought the clothes out to put them away
I'm like yeah this still smells like
some straight desert and so now I'm
individually rewashing everything I'm
just like and Azhar grabs it right and
she smells and she says this smells like
dis dissident dissident ha ha
I wanted to record her so bad when she
said I was like it smells like what
dissident dissident my desert in honey
does it and dissident so yeah i and i'm
happy to rewash that I did sell some of
my clothes I was so excited I was like
yeah mm-hmm so that was a really good
feeling because I'm just gonna take the
money that I got from that and put it
back into the account because I bought
those other shirts from Amazon so that
it technically doesn't touch like the
budget because I'm just selling things
and then Bri putting the money back in
so it generates itself I received one of
those routes to do you know so I did but
I don't want to show you guys just yet
because well I guess I showed you guys
the pink one on me so you know what the
pink would look like on me hmm so the
color that came in today is this color
I'm so excited
[Applause]
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and this one is excuse me goodness know
why am i doing that
it's the Brandon yeah in the Bertha's
the tag says Made in China
Bella Roy I don't know but it's a 3x but
honestly it does fit I mean I like them
so and they're just so comfortable and
you know they're like that material
that's kind of you know it's very light
material so even like during summer time
I'll be able to wear them and not be
lasting hot because they're so
comfortable so so now I have the hot
pink one I have this blue colored one
and then I will get I still have a
couple more colors coming so I'm really
excited to get those ones I showed oli
this one he was like oh my gosh that
it's like a beautiful color I'm like I
know so I'm so happy that he's
supportive with me getting some shirts
that you know that fit but Dodgers about
the fitting but then I can you know like
put in with my leggings and stuff so
that way I've got more plain shirts
because like I said I have tons of
printed shirts from my torrid and stuff
like that but I just don't have like any
role like plain shirts and for me I just
I need that I need some plain shirts
that I don't have so I was really
excited to receive this shirt today and
then have the pink one so yeah and what
else I think that's really yeah we just
didn't do a whole whole lot today
because like I said I was home pretty
much all day by myself with the kids so
I just worked around the house I was
gonna show you guys that's what it was I
was gonna show you guys that the
hamburger pasta dinner but Ollie was
like shaking cuz he hadn't eaten all day
and it was gonna take a while for me to
prep it and cook it so he was like honey
is there any way we can just eat
something like I can just eat regular
you know his Egyptian beans and stuff
like that mmm and I can make that
tomorrow night and I was like yeah
that's fine I was like I'm totally cool
with that so I'll make that tomorrow
night and I'll record it for sure for
you guys so you guys will be able to see
it which of course they'll be
Thanksgiving tomorrow so most of you
guys are gonna be eating some of y'all
made her curd umm so jelly ha no I'm not
real I'm okay I promise
but Saturday so I you know I've had a
lot of people ask me about celebrating
the holidays and stuff and I again you
know
just clarifying I we are our own
personal family we do not celebrate
Thanksgiving or Christmas for our own
personal choices Christmas is more so
because of religious Thanksgiving is for
personal reasons it's not really you
know anything but I don't like you know
I love having the dinner if that makes
sense
I just how can I say this I love having
the dinner I just don't like the
memories that come with some of it on
that exact day so what we have chosen to
do through me going to counseling and
stuff in trying to find ways that will
work around that is something we're
starting this year as a tradition for
our family is the weekend after
Thanksgiving will be our dinner and we
don't have to call Thanksgiving it can
be just a turkey dinner but I get to
have all the traditional dinner you know
things now I have never prepped or
cooked a turkey you guys never in 37
years I have never cooked a turkey so my
honey-bunny is going to sit in there and
help me and teach me how to cook a
turkey so I'm gonna definitely be
recording that on Saturday I'm so
excited to show you guys now for me when
I think of Thanksgiving dinner I think
of turkey of course and gravy and mashed
potatoes and green bean casserole and
stuffing I'm not a stuffy neater but
stuffing is on the table cranberries and
pumpkin pie and things like that that's
what I think of when I think of turkey
dinner
but this year so what I'm gonna do on
Saturdays I'm gonna make the turkey and
mashed potatoes
now Ali's not there I mean mm-hmm so I
think he's not fond of turkey of day of
mashed potatoes I had to think of the
name for a minute but he wants to make
mushy on the side which is cabbage rice
it's like a rice blend with
cabbage rolled and so he's gonna make a
little bit of that for him I'm gonna
make mashed potatoes for myself because
that's what I was wanting but just make
a small little you know a little side of
it because I'm you know will be me and
maybe the two babies eating at Maya does
not eat mashed potatoes he will eat the
turkey but have the mashed potatoes I am
NOT gonna do the green bean casserole
this time reason being because you know
you can always celebrations are an
amazing time to you know eat and be
merry and have fun but when you're on a
journey I was like I am excuse me okay
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anyways okay you guys need to go out
please you look like a very hot mess you
couldn't tell that you just had a bath
today can you nice scratch on your face
yes oh no no nope nope nope you can't
show your belly on camera okay go play
with Maya please and shut Mama's door
shut me door take the elephant hey take
the elephant with you thank you thank
you yours huh okay go eat okay go climb
your tree they keep me rolling anyways I
think ever might have gotten hurt or
something so she might be coming in here
in a minute screaming Oh anyways um but
when you're on a journey like I am and I
am going through such he'll yeah up here
she comes
they were driving me nuts anyways
squirrel an elephant are on their
stampede anywho when you're on a journey
like I am on it's good to embrace the
the
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the memory and make memories and
traditions and all of those things but
you don't have to indulge yourself to
the point of passing those boundaries
that you've put before yourself for
changing your lifestyle if that makes
any sense so for me I am NOT Saturday is
not a day for me just to be like okay
I'm checking out today and I'm just
gonna eat everything I want to eat and I
don't care if I eat past the filling of
being comfortable and mmm because that
all works logically in my brain like
that's part of the binge you know the
binging talking well you can eat all the
food you want it's not it's a
traditional dinner you're eating you
gotta eat it because you're not gonna
have it for another year
well you gotta eat him you got to make
sure you shove in and when you get off
the table you better make sure you're
gonna be in so much pain no like why
would that be fun that doesn't even
sound sound fun to me so what I'm gonna
do is I'm not making the green bean
casserole because I think that's just a
little bit too many options for me to
eat and really there's no reason to have
mashed potatoes and green bean casserole
when you've got the cream of mushroom
and that's a lot of calories a lot of
calories so I'm doing the turkey all
he's gonna make mushy which I'll have a
probably a couple of little rolls
they're just really small rolls of mushy
and then I will have like a spoonful you
know of mashed potatoes with some gravy
and a roll and that will be it and then
I'm thinking we're gonna get for a
dessert that day we'll probably get a
pumpkin pie
I'm pumpkin pie is okay I'm not a
hundred percent fond of it I mean I'll
eat it but it's not like I have it um
but again I'm making traditions and I'm
making memories with my family and that
is just something I want to install on
them so that is what we are doing for
our turkey dinner and so we won't do
ours until Saturday so tomorrow it's
pretty much gonna be a just a regular
day for us
other than you know we will go out at
all because there's really nothing I
mean maybe we'll go to get a drink or
something if there's anything even open
and I think we're gonna work on the
closets tomorrow because really
everybody's gonna be home tomorrow so I
can use everybody's help to pitch in and
bring things down and bring it all so we
can go through it all and you know
organize and declutter and throw away
things that need to be thrown away
um so yeah that's what the plan is for
this time tomorrow but definitely you
know something to keep in mind though is
like you know it always breaks my heart
around the holidays for the less
fortunate and the family you know the
people that are homeless and don't have
families you know sometimes I think that
holidays can get overrated and when I
say that I think sometimes holidays can
bring out the worst pain in some people
and I think the holidays can bring out
the most time that people feel it's the
most rejected and neglected and
abandoned and so I just want to point
that out to you guys that to be so
careful and cautious when you're dealing
with friends and family and co-workers
when you're sharing your family
traditions and experiences and memories
and things that you guys are gonna do
that day just keep a side note that
sometimes when you share those things to
people sometimes those people on the
other side that are receiving that
message are so broken inside because
they're desiring what you're sharing and
they honestly don't get to they don't
get those things because they are one of
the things I just mentioned homeless or
you know maybe they're an outcast on
their family I've been there I felt that
rejection before and it sucks you know
when I celebrated the holidays
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it started to be one of the most painful
times for me because I had known for all
my life you get together on Thanksgiving
and you know you see family that you
haven't seen in a long time and you you
know have this huge feast and yada yada
yada and as my family started to start
pushing me away a little bit due to
choices that I was making with my
marriage and you know things like that
it started to bring a little bit of that
rejection and the abandonment that I
felt because my family was pretty much
just basically kicking me to the curb
and so when I would sit at home and know
that my family is all celebrating this
amazing holiday that I used to remember
having amazing memories on it was so
painful for me because I only desire to
have those same traditions and memories
being served with the family and I
wasn't being able to anymore so really
just keep in sight when you're talking
to others you know if you can go and
serve at a homeless shelter you know
that's something that when Jeremiah is a
little bit older I want to take him to
do that and serve at a homeless shelter
so that he can see the the people that
are lost the people that are lonely that
don't have family but still need to be
loved and accepted somewhere and they
all deserve a good dinner a warm dinner
you know and one to also be able to make
their own family and their own memories
of their own even if it's in a shelter
you know but just be really cautious
because I think sometimes people forget
when they're so excited and they're
sharing their memories and their fond
times and what they're gonna do that day
and where they're gonna go and who
they're gonna be with sometimes the
person receiving the message is just
crying inside because they're just
feeling like you know
wishing they were you because they want
that same experience and they're not so
just a side thing to think about
nothing nothing biggie but I was
thinking about that today and I always
get very emotional around the holidays
because I've walked the shoes of the
people that have felt that so it's
always something that I always think
about you know on the back of my head is
people that are suffering during these
times you know and people that are
suffering because you know maybe they
have lost a loved one or a child or an
animal during this time and this is such
a painful time for them that they can't
they can't celebrate they can't find the
happiness you know or they maybe they
feel too guilty to celebrate because
they feel guilty being able to move on
while the other person is you know gone
away so just just be cautious that's all
I want to say is just be cautious I also
want to thank again all of my new
subscribers you guys are just blowing my
channel up and I am so thankful for
every one of you this is just I went to
bed crying last night because I just am
so touched I am so touched by all of the
amazing messages that I am receiving
from everybody you guys have no idea how
much you guys make such a difference in
my life and how you guys continue to
make me press on and push forward every
single day because I am so supported by
you guys and I just want to thank all of
you guys that have just joined and all
of my other subscribers that have been
here for a long time you guys are
amazing I say that all the time because
I mean it from the bottom of my heart I
mean it so anyways I just wanted to say
thank you guys for that Oh what else
want else I was thinking earlier today
when I was folding laundry and I was
like where is this
you're really gone like I can't believe
we're already at the end of November we
have just a short couple of weeks and
we're gonna already be in 2019 like
where has the time gone and I really sat
back and was thinking about you know
like where this year has taken me from
you know such heartache and being a
victim of abuse and trying to really
surface my emotions and dealing with so
much from my past to starting this life
journey that I was so prominent and I
mean dying to do because I want to
change so bad physically and emotionally
and seeing that my body is changing and
seeing that you know I am I'm personally
changing emotionally I am changing I am
getting so much stronger every single
day this year is just it's been it's
gone so fast like I just it I feel like
we just was were celebrating New Year's
2018 and it's like oh my gosh we're
already back to almost watching the ball
drop again so yeah I am just amazed at
where this year has taken us and how
much has changed in my life in this
whole year like this year has been such
an amazing year for me and I am so so so
excited to see where this next year is
gonna take me I started this channel in
April kind of doing like shopping hauls
and things like that but you know
nothing like really like you know I
didn't I didn't think I was gonna do
daily vlogs I didn't think that that was
what I was gonna do but clearly my
channel changed and when I started my
journey I was like you know what I want
to share this with people I want to
share this with others so that they know
that they are not alone in that you know
I'm right here with them and as I'm
struggling they're struggling
we couldn't struggle together we can
build each other up and so when I
started the vlogging daily I was just
like hey this is like something I really
enjoy doing like this is like a passion
for me and I wake up every day now
thinking about oh my gosh
I get to talk to you guys I get to share
with you guys again my day and what I'm
going through and what's happening and
it's it's just I love doing what I do
and that's why I had talked to you guys
about it the other day that I don't look
at this as a job yes you can consider it
a job yes and if somebody asks you what
is your occupation
I am a youtuber but I don't think of it
as a job because to me it's a not a job
this is my passion I love doing this and
you guys all make it worth me wanting to
do it because I love every one of you
guys but I'm so excited to see where
this channel is gonna go with this
coming year I just hope and pray that it
continues to grow and I just want to see
it grow because that to me means that
there's so many amazing people that not
only am i connecting with but they are
connecting with me I talk to you guys
all the time
I have emails coming in all the time I
get to message you guys all the time the
friendships that I have created yes
maybe we haven't met in person maybe we
are YouTube friends but you know what
I've I've seen people talk about you
know how YouTube friends are not real
friends yes they are yes they are
they're just like a pen pal you become
so personal with each other that I do
look at you guys as a friend I sometimes
feel really sad for the ones that say
that about their channel that they're
their subscribers are not friends
because to me I feel like that's almost
like shot down to the subscribers
because then what are they just a number
is that what they really are like I
don't get it
so to me you guys are my friend I love
every one of you guys you guys have in
some way or another impact in my life
all in the best ways ever I've not had
one negative thing that has hot
my life to bring me down from this
channel and so to me yes I believe every
one of you guys are a friendship to me
am I gonna meet every one of you in
person probably not but it doesn't mean
that we're not talking all the time and
sharing things and you guys are getting
to see the ins and outs of my life on a
daily and I get to hear stories from
each of you guys on a daily so I do
believe it is a friendship so I'm really
excited to see where 2019 is gonna take
all of us you know I think this channel
is gonna take off in the most positive
way and it's because of you guys that
it's gonna take off and I'm so excited
to see what we get to do this year
because I'm getting healthier I'm
starting to move around more does that
mean we get to go on a vacation maybe
this year do I get to take you guys
along on life-changing journeys I mean
who knows what we're gonna do
but this coming year I believe is gonna
be a very good strong year for me and
for my family and for you guys as well
because you guys are gonna be right
along with us so I'm so excited I'm so
excited and I just okay I'll stop there
I am NOT gonna give you guys nightmares
not tonight anyways I hope you guys have
an amazing Thanksgiving with your
families make blessed memories and great
traditions for everybody in all of the
tradition of the traditions all of the
generations that are down below you guys
that are going to be coming on up so I
will be thinking about all of you guys
on this exciting fun day take care you
guys I will be dreaming about turkeys
for Saturday until then sweet dreams you
guys bye-bye
